on love.

love is costly.
if my study on the Fourth Gospel has taught me anything it is this.
in The Gospel According to John, Leon Morris comments that for the author, the love of God which the author is depicting is not a sentimental love, but a love that costs.
the Father's love was a love that did not withhold. He gave the best he had, all he had -- his Only Son.
the many commands to love Jesus charges his disciples with in the fourth gospel must be seen in light of the Father's exemplary love and His love for his own.

this made me think about all the times I make the excuse that I cannot will myself to feel love for God, for my father, for someone whom the desire to love is lacking.
but real love is not about sentimentality or feeling emotions; it is about the giving of oneself, for the other, many times in spite of a lack of feeling or desire to do so.

I ask myself, how much has it cost me to love?
how much of myself have I freely given, when it costs me discomfort, rejection, hurt, disappointment, humiliation, or forgiveness?
the truth is I am unwilling to love, to give that kind and quality of love despite not having received it for myself
love must be given, but not only if and when it is deserved

so I am humbled by the utter humiliation Jesus was willing to endure, on the cross, and also in the act of washing the disciples' feet. an act not even fit for Jewish slaves.

And the concept of love is so intimately tied to obedience, and to faithfulness
there was no bound or limit to the extent of Jesus' love for his own, but everything he did was in obedience to the Father's will, to glorify the Father, and so that they might know him, so they might believe and be saved in his name

perhaps you cannot separate the element of obedience from love
Jesus says if you love me, you will keep my commands
and he commands us to love as he has loved us.

That we love one another is what identifies those who are his disciples


we love not because we feel like it, not because it is deserved, but because Jesus has loved us, how he has loved us, and he has commanded us to do the same.

God withheld nothing. I withhold everything.


I look within myself and think I don't have it in me
I don't have love to give

but God's love not only serves as an example, it also evokes our own loving response.